There are certain things in this world that are just meant to be together. It is called the Harmony of Reese's Pieces. Peanut butter + chocolate = heaven. Blondie + pink or powdered blue = sexy chick. The world was designed with these harmonious unions in mind.
So, when the harmony is broken...all is not well with the world!!!
Well, we have to report that Wiz Khalifa and Snoop Dogg have perpetrated a violation of the Harmony of Reese's Pieces with their recent release, Young and Wild and Free.
Here is a song with a great beat and chorus. The rapping skills of Snoop Dogg in this really took Wiz to school. Bruno Mars does the vocals. It's a fantastic compilation.
Except!!! The lyrics suck. This song cannot be about smoking weed and not caring. We got the peanut butter but no chocolate!!! Oh, hell no!!!
Is there anyone out there who knows how to do an online petition? We must demand for this song to be redone. Get back to the studio and come out with some good lyrics. We want our chocolate!!!
The Harmony of Reese's Pieces has been broken. We shall not rest unless the harmony is restored.
Congratulations Class of 2014!!! It is graduation time for all you newly graduates. It's been a long road of hard work and sweat. You must be excited to be released into the jaws of the dog eat dog world. It's a jungle out there. Buyer beware, or else buyer remorse!!!
Well, to help you prepare for life in the real world, we have invited a special guest to give the valedictorian speech. This is one of the most important lessons in life. Yes, indeed, this is pure wisdom with zen and yoda. So, without further adieu, please give a warm welcome to our Class 2014 Valedictorian!!!
history and allowed Leno to blindside you!!! Had Conan looked into the past, he would have learned that in 1993, a very similar event happened where Leno schemed behind the scenes to usurp the Tonight Show gig from David Letterman, who was waiting respectfully for Johnny Carson to retire. Letterman then left NBC and went to CBS to start his own show. Ahhh...history really did repeat itself. So, in honor of this valuable life lesson, we shall take a look back at our history, and learn from it...lest we repeat the same mistake. Here is the last show of David Letterman at NBC before he went to CBS....in the summer of 1993.
I grew up during the MTV generation. Remember that time? For those of you who are a bit younger, there was a time when music was only played on the radio. OMG!!! Yeah, the only time you saw music on TV was for a live performance such as the Tonight Show. Then, the geniuses over at MTV gave us one of the greatest inventions in the history of civilization. One day, music videos dropped out of the sky. I was like, "What is this? Why do they keep playing music on TV? What's with the dancing and the different scenes?" Yes, it was a mind-blowing breakthrough for my generation. And now, as you might have noticed, I like watching videos.
One of the pioneers of early music videos was Madonna. She put together a style that has since been imitated by many but never duplicated. The imitations fade but the original has stood the test of time. Madonna was a sensual, provocative combination of seduction, sexuality, mischief, rebellion, ambition, eloquence, and grace. Just like Coca-Cola, you don't mess with perfection. Just give us regular Coke and original Madonna. She encompassed the full spectrum from lovely woman to naughty girl. Her impact on my childhood left an impression that would today spawn this blog. So, here at Blondes are from Heaven, we salute you, Madonna, for your music, your style, and defining the concept of sex appeal. The first inductee into our Blondie Hall of Fame is the one....the only....Madonna. Watch her work her magic to captivate a nation.
When I was in high school, I had an art history project that had me visiting a modern art museum. It was really strange in there to say the least. There were some really weird paintings that resembled nothing. Two exhibits, in particular, have been etched into my mind to this day. One was a giant sculpture of two Siamese twins who were conjoined with the same penis. That penis shot straight up and was about 3 stories tall. The second was a mechanical display of lumberjacks in the woods. One was having sex with a tree. The other was screwing the ground. The display was mechanical, and so they were moving!!! I left the museum scarred for life.
Now, what does this have to do with anything you ask? Well, special thanks to Miley Cyrus for taking me on a stroll down memory lane with her critically acclaimed performance at the 2013 MTV Video Music Awards. The giant bears, the tongue, the twerking, the foam finger, the bizarre dancing..."Where have I seen this before?", I thought to myself? Ahhh yes, that unforgettable day at the museum. Apparently, I was not the only person who saw the abstract art form hidden in the chaos. Miley's performance inspired a tribute by one of her crazed fans. Here at Blondes are from Heaven, we are post-modern. Enjoy!!!
Here at Blondes are from Heaven, we value integrity above all else. So, we do not put blondies on a pedestal and fawn at them shamelessly. Oh no, we speak the truth! Blondies are human. They fail just like the rest of us. Instead of looking the other way, we stare right into the train wreck and bring you a collection of timeless blondie fails. Vote for your favorite!!!
1) Blondie on Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?
Leading off, as the saying goes, "don't judge a book by its cover". Truer words have never been spoken as a lovely blonde contestant opens up her inner geography book and allows us to peruse the blank pages. Now, in her defense, there is a technicality here. Hungry and Hungary are not pronounced the same way. It's hun-gry vs Hun-ga-ry. We are always striving to educate.
2) Miss South Carolina
Ah yes, the now classic blondie fail from Miss South Carolina. She made America proud with her response during the Question & Answer portion. Her immortal words give true meaning to the letters WTF. An interesting part of this is that she appears to have prepared for the answer?
3) Paris Hilton
After serving time in PRISON, Paris Hilton appeared on the Late Show with David Letterman. Letterman reached deep within his anus and pulled out as much asshole as he could to get her talking about her prison experience. For some mysterious reason, Paris kept taking the bait. Oh, blondie, just say No!!! What ensued was one excruciating interview that goes down in Letterman Show lore. Enjoy!!!
4) Alexandra Wallace
Then, there's this one. This is the infamous racist rant by a UCLA student. No words can do justice to this failure of epic proportions. I am speechless. I am without speech. Jaw dropped, but no wong coming out. SMH...roll the video.
Here at Blondes are from Heaven, we appreciate both style and substance. We like blondies with talent! And to prove that point, let's engage in an intellectual debate that has raged for decades. That is, who sings the classical song, Memory, better? Barbara Streisand or Elaine Paige? Both have iconic golden voices of their generation. Barbara is American, and Elaine is English. They both sing it with their own unique style and flare that make their respective countries proud. Is it a coincidence that they are both blonde? What is the correlation between blondie and great singing?
This is a prestigious title, indeed. Only the most accomplished singers have earned the privilege of singing this timeless classic. So, we must take time and thoroughly contemplate this issue before casting a vote. Is it going to be Streisand or Paige? Enjoy!
1) Barbara Stresiand
This is recorded for the official music video.
2) Elaine Paige
This is from the original Cats musical.
Have you ever seen a sexy blondie and did a double take? Wow, that's an interesting hair color isn't it? Then, you may be wondering, is that her natural hair color? I, for one, have contemplated this question many times. And I say there must be a way to tell if she is in fact the real thing or a bottled imitation. Here at Blondes are from Heaven, integrity is the cornerstone of our superficiality. At the very least, we need to be gawking at blondes who are truly blonde. We shall not be mocked. So, in the name of truth in advertising, let's play one of my favorite games! Blonde or not blonde?
Below are some sexy purportedly blonde chicks. Now, can you tell if they are blonde or not blonde? Vote now and comment below!
1) Gwen Stefani
Now, here is the prototypical sexy blonde. Let's take a moment to check out her sexy. So, blonde or not blonde? I want the truth!!! I can handle it!!!
2) Trish Stratus
Nothing hotter than a kick-ass blondie. I would luv to do some rolling around wrestling with this baby. Let's appreciate her artistry in the ring. Time to go to the judges' score cards. Blonde or not blonde? I need me some stratisfcation!
3) Taylor Swift
Very talented...but is that considered blonde? What category is her hair color? Let's analyze this. Handle with care....if you know what i mean.
4) Sharon Stone
Finally, a blondie classic. Her performance in Basic Instinct, the first one, was simply breathtaking. Plus, she gave us all a great hint! Of course, one way to tell if a girl is blonde is to check underneath the hood. I mean, if she dyes her hair down there, that is some serious attention to detail, worthy of a blondie exemption! Let's take a closer look at the most paused moment in movie history. Is that a blondie kitty I see?